Somewhere
I'm wanted.
In my dreams
Im finally happy.
Somewhere
I'm loved.
In my dreams
I know no pain.
Somewhere
I'm helped.
In my dreams
I've closed the door.
Somewhere
I'm home.
In my dreams
I've left the world
No one beside me,
No one to guide me,
All my life I'm alone.
Feelings of dying,
Flee from the lying,
All I want is a home.
A soul weak and weary,
Dreams dark and dreary,
All these aches are my own.
You made my life hell
From the lies that you tell,
Reasons why are unknown.
I always will be lost and incomplete.
There's a hole in my life that was ripped away.
There lies no comfort for my soul,
Death and misery drown every thought,
Leaving my life meaningless.
There is nothing for me here.
What do I have to live for?
No one cares,
No one's concerned.
Just throw my body into a ditch,
Throw all life away.
Heaven has become a dream...
Shame and sorrow rots my being.
Hell is where my soul lies,
Where all my life has been lived,
Hell is my home.
I know not of happiness and love.
All of that is in the past.
Death makes me smile.
What does it take
to keep you away?
You don't understand
what hell you bring
upon me. . .
Must I scream bloody murder?
Must every tear fall from my dismal eyes?
What will it take?
I never deserved any of this.
I should never live in pain.
But you brought it,
You put this upon me.
I should never
shed a tear
because of you.
You are the cause
of my suffering.
You brought me down.
My arm is inked, my hair is gone
What did I do that was hateful or wrong?
I never told lies, I stayed to the truth
I'm a young girl at eight, only a youth.
I'm skinny, pale and I hurt all-around
My mom and dad were not to be found.
Why, dear god. Why did you pick me?
To be placed in a camp, long as the eye could see.
I want my parents, my brother and sister
But all I got was a bruise and a blister.
I want to hear the birds and see the sun glow,
When freedom will come? No one will know.
The dirty, dark smoke encased the fresh air
The smell of burned flesh was inhaled everywhere.
Mass graves were dug, bodies were thrown
Then cove
They came in groups, they came in packs
They took our stuff and threw them in sacks
They forced us all out, they made us all leave
The fact of this happening was hard to believe.
They lined us up, they made us all walk
We were scared to move, even to talk
We were hit or beaten when we didn't obey
We got blisters and bruises at the end of each day.
One uniform each was all that we got
One small loaf of bread was not a whole lot.
They tattooed your arm and shaved off your hair
Your body felt empty, unclean, and bare.
The only thing left was the feeling of fear
The sighs and crying was all you could hear.
The looks of the Jews were
When I reached Auschwitz, I stood in a line
Not sure what's happening, yet nervously fine.
When I reached the front, I saw what they're doing
They grabbed the Jew's arms and started tattooing.
It was my turn next, I was scared with fright
When they grabbed my arm, I did not fight.
The pain was intense and uncomfortable too
And on my left arm were numbers of blue.
Roll call was different, it wasn't the same
They called my by numbers instead of my name.
We have no name, they're far in the past
The feelings and emotions were not meant to last.
All faith was lost, no longer there
And the feeling of hope was precious and rare.
But on
You don't understand what its like to be me,
To be blocked from the world and never be free.
I'm not very popular or even the best,
They all think I'm weird, freaky, or mest.
Yes I do have a chain and I do dress in black,
When you come in your groups I feel I'm under attack.
Your glares sting as though I was shot in the heart,
When you scream out mean names I start to all fall apart.
I know I'm different but what's wrong with that,
It's not like I'm stupid, ugly, or fat.
I am who I am and you shouldnt disagree,
Because I'm proud of being different and also being me.
I act real nice, yet you turn me down,
You look at me with a sigh and a frown.
I try to be one of the girl's who are "in",
Yet, you all act as though I've comitted a sin.
I try to do things considered to be cool,
But you make me feel as if I was a fool.
I make an attempt to become a good friend,
But the hate and rejection won't come to an end.
I make myself pretty, lovely, and tall,
But you look with disgust as I pass through the hall.
I attempt to come help you when you look like you need it,
But you reject my help and then make a big fit.
This rejection from you is all i can take,
I can't stand to look like a fony or fake.
So
I glance out the window to see the blue sky,
With birds all-around and flying up high.
I wish I could be there to run in the sun,
But I stay a house cat and having no fun.
The smell of the flowers and the the feel of the breeze,
Makes me feel real happy but makes humans sneeze.
I wish I was out there wild and free,
To lay on the grass and climb up a tree.
Though these dreams seem silly and weird,
The life in a big world was nothing I feared.
I guess napping all day is the way I shall live,
And no life outside is a thing to forget and forgive.
Have you ever felt depressed, left out, and sad,
Because the family's you see make you feel mad.
Have you ever felt that your soul has just flown,
And made you feel lonely, lost, and alone.
Have you ever felt unloved cause your parents ran away ,
And left you to be alone and forgotten to this very day.
Have you ever felt that you have a heart of stone,
All because you were left out, not there, and alone.
Have you ever felt empty, abandoned, and bare,
When your life meant nothing and was always unfair,
Have you ever felt that your courage was blown,
And left you to be miserable, pitiful, and alone.
Have you ever felt lost, unhappy,
We've been best friends since the day that we met,
This friendship of ours is something not to forget.
We always were unseparable, and always together,
We acted as though we were two birds of a feather.
We never got mad, or got into a fight,
We would always go to the mall or sleep overnight.
We would laugh at things that we saw at school,
And act weird at recess or act like a fool.
We didn't really notice when people just stared,
I bet its because we really never cared.
I hope this friendship never ends,
All because we've been best friends.
I see you crying all alone by the door,
Your tears fall lightly down on the floor.
What could have caused you to be sad and to cry?
To have bruises on your arm, and a mark on your eye.
You stay away from the crowd, away from your friend,
When I ask you what's wrong you tell lies and pretend.
You're doing things you shouldn't and becoming a mess,
Is it because your tired or having some stress?
I know what your family's like, I've seen them before,
They've yelled and screamed ever since you were four.
Your tears of sorrow give me the feeling of gloom,
And wonder what you do all alone in your room.
I see you walk past me every day th
I help you on homework,
You don't say a word,
I give you some pens,
Then look as though I'm absurd.
I give you the answers,
But you just walk away,
I give you a pass,
Then you forget the next day.
I give a suggestion,
You think it was dumb.
I tell you to stop,
When you start to hum.
I give you some paper,
But you then ask for more.
I lend you my books,
But you drop them on the floor.
I let you go first,
You don't say thank you,
I tell you assignments,
But you say they aren't true.
I try getting you to work,
But you don't give a hoot.
I try to be nice,
But then tell me to scoot.
I try saying stop,
But why should you ca
I never understood why you would wish upon a star.
Surely it can't hear you from so very, very far?
Surely it can't help you from so very, very high?
I feel that those who wish on stars are living out a lie.
A star has no emotions, it just twinkles o'er the land.
Why should it be there if you should need a helping hand?
I though, care most deeply, I have and always will,
And shall be here when you need me, through times both good and ill.
So next time you feel helpless, as if you're lost at sea,
Instead of wishing on a star, why don't you wish on me?
*Dedicated to my father, the one who made my life a living hell.
Nine years.
Nine years and no apologies,
No emotions,
Always you.
Why I grew up with you,
Who knows,
Who cares...
You were always a jerk.
To my mother,
My sister,
Brother,
And now me.
Why?
You have no friends,
No support,
You're just a fool.
A fool for a father.
You were abusive.
I remember you dragging my brother,
Dragging him along the hard cement floor.
No mercy.
You could care less about what happened to him,
Just as long as we saw you the next day,
Seeing you and acting as if nothing happened.
But something did,
And it will stick with you forever
Current Residence: Dez Moinez IOWA! Favourite genre of music: Mainly Rock....?!? Favourite photographer: um..................................ME!....i cant take photos that well......meh Favourite style of art: My Style....the one the only Operating System: Windows XP MP3 player of choice: Winamp....It really kicks the llamas ass!! Shell of choice: Turtle Shell Wallpaper of choice: Black and green stripes! Skin of choice: Tanish (my skin color) Favourite cartoon character: Ralph Bender Cartman [Cheshire Cat] Personal Quote: The fear of death, is worse than death itself.
Favourite Visual Artist
My Cousin forgottendream <3 YA! and Gris Grimly!!
Favourite Movies
The Nightmare Before Christmas! and Van Helsing!
Favourite Bands / Musical Artists
SOAD GREENDAY!!!! Nirvana Linkin Park Blink 182 Slipknot Ac/Dc Disturbed
Favourite Writers
Edgar Allan Poe : read the book Tales of Mystery and Madness! its AWESOME!
Favourite Games
Dance Dance Revolution! 1 or 2 lol
Favourite Gaming Platform
P.C. Gameboy PS2
Tools of the Trade
My crappy laptop, rhymezone.com, and anything thats close to me I guess
Hey everyone,
I am SO busy with school now that Im a highschooler! OMG! Things dont come to an end.
I LOVE Dowling High! FUN FUN FUN!
Just a heads up, I probably wont be on for a while. I have a virus on my computer at home and so I will not be checking everyones wicked awesome stuff 24/7. Hopefully I can snag a Library computer from time to time.
Will, my brother is at college now....has been for like 5 weeks or something but home just aint the same now that he's gone. WAAAAY to quiet. But I do get his room which has been turned from a plain ordinary room to a bright purple and lime green colored room. My sister and I were thinking of d
School letters have been coming in for me, what a drag. This weekend and next week are like my last days of freedom. At least my mom and I had a successful day of school clothes shopping. Usually we end up very mad at eachother and someone would start crying. It was stressful but this year was different....Interesting.....
August 14th 2005 : Freshman Mass and Information Time
August 18th 2005 : Freshman Orientation from 8:00 to 11:00
August 22nd 2005 : Classes begin
August ???? 2005 : Choir lunch for parents and kids
**I guess I am excited to be going to Dowling. No more of taking care of those beastly kindergarteners who scream and yell
Spread the DA love around! (you can copy and paste this message on their userpage!)
*dingding* RULES:
1- You can kiss the person who kissed you!
2- You can't kiss the person more than 3 times
3- You -MUST- kiss 6 other people
4- You should kiss them in public! Paste it on their user page! c'mon..don't be scared of public displays of affection
5- Random kisses are perfectly okay! (and sweet)
6- You should most definitely get started kissing right away!